AM I A WEIRDO

I just came out of McDonald's. I Had a nice burger as I was sitting in the sunshine. To have this kind of a nice weather in September in Finland, is not that common. But I will enjoy as long as it lasts. September is anyway one of my favorite months here. Beautiful and fresh!

As I was sitting there with my burger, I started to think about all the restrictions that the spiritual world, well the world in general too, teaches us. Don't eat burgers, don't eat meat, don't smoke, don't drink, don't drink coffee, don't have chocolate, don't eat donuts. Don't don't don't. Somehow I have never related to these restrictions.

I am a spiritual person. I am a yoga teacher. I am NOT a vegetarian. I do drink every now and then and I do smoke two cigarettes every day. I eat meat sometimes and I do enjoy nice chocolate when ever I feel like it. I have always been this way. 

I think that as we are searching our true essence and we lean on for help, we start to forget a little bit our own likes and desires. We start to listen to our teachers and we start to copy their way of living. We truly think that this is the only way to be and live. Following blindly to someone else's ways, takes us further and further away from our own truth. 

Yes, I am a spiritual being. As long as I breath, I am a spirit. What we tend to forget when seeking salvation is, that not only are we spirits, but we are HUMAN! We are here to have a FULL human experience with our spirit guiding us. This for me means that all that I see in this world are a gift to me. All is here to teach me something about myself. All these different things are like tools to get closer to my truth and authenticity. For me this world is like a huge playground with different things and situations to play with. 

If my soul mission in this world would be a total enlightenment, then I would probably move to Tibet with the monks and sit in meditation for hours and days. No problem. But, I don't think that this is my goal in this lifetime. More it is about finding my true essence, my authentic self and enjoy this human experience to it's fullest! I want to be aware and I want to aim for a higher conscious. But at the same time, I am fully grounded to my human essence. 

If we are dealing with any addiction like behavior, well like my smoking before, I think we have to check behind the addiction and find out the root cause of it. This is why I have been sitting with myself and asking "why do I still want to smoke"? Before the reasons might have been different. It was a tool to help me deal with the inner turmoil that I was going through. Smoking helped me when I was feeling anxiety or anger or stress. I definitely smoked more when having those emotions. 

Smoking also was part of my social life. It was a habit that I adapted since I was a kid from my surroundings. I got used to it. Basically everybody was smoking! So it was obvious that I would start too. Smoking made me badass in the school. 

So here are few reasons for my smoking. During my inner journey I have sat with this many many wonderful times! Why I feel guilty if I smoke? Why should I stop? Is there still a part of me that isn't healed and I need smoking to avoid something?

After years of inner work I now make a CONSCIOUS CHOICE to smoke. The energy behind smoking is now different then before. I enjoy it. Smoking my evening cigarette is my meditation. It grounds me very well. I like my few cigarettes as much as I like my chocolate. The amount of cigarettes are less then before, maybe two to three a day and I am very aware of the health issues that is said it causes. 

But for me, the way I think is "anything done with joy and without guilt, can not hurt you". If you have sat with your addiction and with this behavior, if you have dived deep into the root causes of your addiction, if you have asked yourself why I do what I do, then I am sure that you will do it less, even if you keep doing it a bit. You have now changed the energy behind the addiction. IF you keep on doing it, then you are making a conscious choice and take full responsibility of this action. 

I truly believe that when things are done out of pure joy and enjoyment and consciously, nothing can not hurt you. Our bodies are so very wise and you will FEEL, if something is not good for you. 

I don't want to live my life with too many restrictions or doing constant researches. Too much information takes the joy out and replaces it with fear. If I feel like having a burger and meat, then I have it! It is not like I do it all the time, but sometimes my body is saying: "Hey, enjoy life! I need the meat now!" Or my cigarettes. I enjoy them fully and with all my heart! 

So be bravely you! Listen to you! Listen to your body, your soul! Take the advices you feel resonating with your truth and leave the rest. Get conscious of your behavior and from this place, enjoy the human experience fully! With all it's beauty and colors! We are NOT just spirits (spiritual), we are also human and us humans, we are not meant to be perfect, but perfect enough!

Be the weirdo you came here to be! I am and I am so very proud of it!