ENERGY LANGUAGE

I am so fascinated about energies. I have been aware of different energies for a long time and yet I feel like I have only touched the surface. I am eager to learn more! The more I clean my inner being, the more energies I feel. How cool!

You know the feeling when you enter the room and straight away you can sence the atmosphere? This is how sensitive we are to energies without being fully aware of it! Everything and everyone effects us a lot, because everything and everyone has their own unique energy. I call it "the energy language". 

Every country, every city, every person has their own unique energy language and now I want to share something personal. 

Today I want to share a personal picture that shocked me when I made it. The difference is so huge. This picture is a perfect excample of the energy language. What happens when the energy language is aligned with your own. You will find the picture little later on the text. 

So, as you know, I was born and raised in Finland. The country of the Santa Clause and the country where they say are the happiest people in the world (I am sorry, but this is a statement I am questioning big time 😂). 

As I started to go deeper into my traumas I realized that I need space from Finland and my home town. Basically from everything here. Not, because I was mad or because I was blaiming anybody, but just for me. To have the energetic space to feel, heal and spend time with myself. 

So I headed to Africa and for sure, not only healing, but to learn a lot of new skills that I didn't have before. This invironment forced me to learn relaxation, letting go of control, to set boundaries. Bit by bit I started to come more feminine. Specially later in my years there (since I have been there on/off for 14 years), I started to enjoy my feminine features more. 

This space from Finland also gave my soul a change to expand! I found so much new features from myself! Finland has a very limiting energy that keeps my soul very contracted. Finnish people carry a lot of shame and guilt and we are taught from a very small kids not to keep noice, to be humple and if something good happens, don't "brag" about it, but keep it to yourself. 

When everything is very controlled, it takes the joy out of life. The busy lifestyle that we have here doesn't leave any room for relaxation. You have to do do do all the time or you are a very bad person. I am sure that this mentality will be found from other countries too, not only Finland. 

Africa is about hassling, but somehow the energy still is different then here in Europe. When I was walking in the streets, I can say that everybody greets you. So you are seen! Even the strangers give you compliments and again, you are seen. This does boost your selfconfidence. No matter what anybody says, my own truth is, that the outside world HAS TO support your own being energetically and this makes you shine, expand! You can love yourself fully, like I do, but when the invironment doesn't support this, it is hard. To be honest, I feel very uncomfortable here and this has nothing to do with my self-esteem or the love that I have towards myself. I just don't fit into this energy, period.

Now, I want to make it very clear that I am not writing this to put Finland down and Africa up. No no. This is about me! This is about the energy language of these two countries. This is about my own energy language that has changed so much after a lot of healing. I have just outgrown the energy language of Finland. That's all. This is not a judgement towards the country I was born in and also this is not a statement that life in Africa is like a paradise! There are good and less good features in both!

This is about becoming aware of what suits you. What energy language you feel the most aligned with. 

Now, I will show you the picture. This is what happenned to me physically when I left Finland in 2019. I was 51 years old. I went back home to Africa in March after being in Finland about a year. It was just before the covid. The picture on the right side was taken about two years later, so I would be 53 years old. I was shocked when I saw the difference. This is what literally happens when the energy language is a match with yours!

To be honest, I started to cry when I saw this picture. It gave me so much understanding about how I feel when I am in Finland. I was trying and trying and trying to fit in and feel alive here. I seriously though that there was something wrong with me, because I can't.

It is very dangerous when in spiritual circles we use quotes like: "when you can be happy where you are, you will be happy anywhere" or "be grateful for what you have" or "life happens for you, not to you". OMG, these frases make me so angry, because for me this is total bullshit! What a fucking mental rape it is to say something like this to someone when they are experiencing something heavy in their life! We really really need to break all the old spiritual boxes and understand that we are energy and we have our own energy language! And some people, places and countries support your energy language more then others! 

When you are aligned with your own unique energy language, gratefulness and gratitude comes naturally. It just happens! You don't have to force it. When you feel your heart is singing, how can you not be grateful? In those moments, I surely don't take nothing, absolutely even the smallest thing, for granted!

My authentic truth at this very moment, here in Finland is that I am at peace with the situation and not trying to force things to move forward, but am I happy? No fucking way! I want more! I want to shine! I want to feel lighter! I want to laugh and bring the woman in me outside to play for everyone to see! I am loud, I am emotional, I have fire and fuck! I need more energetic space!

So, even if this picture made me cry, because at the moment I do look like the lady on the left side (not a critism towards myself, just a fact), it also gave me a huge feeling of relief! It finally hit me that no matter what I would do here, even if I would stand on my head for days, the energy that I need to expand, can't be found here. I finally stopped forcing myself to this energy mode and gave myself permission to leave. To live somewhere else. 

So, the lesson of this writing I guess is, that everything around us effects our being big time! Choose wisely! If I wouldn't have gone to Africa for a holiday long time ago, I would have never ever had the experience of how much my own energy can change and expand! Thank god I did! 

Ps. This expandion in your energy language happens for example, when you go for a holiday. Isn't it so that on a holiday you are more open, free and relaxed? And can you imagine, that this expanded version of you just might be who you truly are! Just saying... 

I know that eventually I am heading towards energies that support my soul and my being and for that I am so happy. And yes grateful too 😍😅!