NEW BEGINNINGS - EXPLORING LIFE!

We, as humans, go through many new beginnings during our lifetime. I haven't really though about life this way before, but as I look at my old posts here and in my other blog (Perfect enough!), I realize that I have been writing about "new beginnings" several times. How many posts end to a phrase "I am in front of something new"!

Now, for sure, everytime you leave your job or you end up a relationship, you surely are in front of something new and unknown. But this "new beginning" that I am refering here, is more about internal shifts. Let me bring in Victoria (my higher self) and Roger (my ego), so we can have a more deeper talk.

"Love, you can explain in your own words how do you see these inner shifts that you call new beginnings", says Victoria. "I am sure, that you are the expert, since it is about your inner world". 

Okay, I say. Let me try. 

As I have gone through this inner healing process and I am able to shed my old fears and beliefs, my inner being and energy has shifted big time. Sheding an old belief doesn't happen in one day, but it is a process and it takes what it takes. The first thing that happens is, that I SEE (I become aware) of it. Let me give you an example. 

I might start to feel uncomfortable all of a sudden. First I acknowledge the feeling. Then I sit with it and let it "talk to me". Where is this coming from? Why am I feeling what I am feeling? Like, now for a couple of days, I have had this feeling of "being so very old and tired". It makes me feel heavy and lifeless. So I allowed it to be and suddenly yesterday, I got the answer of what is going on. My mom and my grandmom were always complaining about their health and inventing diseases that were not existing! This was, of cause, so they would get the attention that they needed from outside of them. But this inventing bodily problems where there were none, made the energy feel "old and tired". And I am still carring this energy! 

Well, now my healing process is on, since I can see where this inner feeling and heaviness is coming from. Phase two, for me, is to let it take what it takes. The most important thing for me, is that I know it is going out from my system. If I feel like I have to do something about it, I will. If I need to talk to someone, I will. These days, this process goes quite naturally and I really don't have to do that much. I just allow this knowingness to be there and then one day....BUM! It is gone and I am more free and light! And here is where we get to the "new beginning" part!

"This is so interesting!", Victoria says with enthusiasm. "I love this! Then what? Tell us, tell us!" I smile to her and continue my story. 

So, everytime a belief or a fear is cleanced out of my system, something heavy and dark is removed. This old energy is replaced with new, fresh and ligher energy. This energy doesn't allow me to live in an old way. Now, I am not saying that clearing one belief or fear will feel like a "new beginning", but of cause it might. How the process has gone with me is, that after clearing loads of old beliefs and fears, I am in a new state of being. I am in front of, what feels like, a new beginning. When my inner world changes, my energy changes. This means that I don't "pull in" the same experiences anymore, but the ones that are a match to my new energy. So my external experiences change hugely! And this is always, to me, like a new beginning!

"This is so beautiful lovie!", says Victoria. "You are becoming to a inner place where you are starting to understand, that life is not to survive, but to explore. Like Christopher Columbus!", she laughs.

YES! I love this! 

"You were send here to earth in this lifetime to break free from the old ways of being a human. Instead of surviving and working in order to get bigger cars or houses, you now start to understand, that we're born to explore and experience. To learn! Some experiences cost more than others, but that is okey. And when you start to understand this, you don't cry over the money "you lost", because you didn't actually "loose anything", but learned a lot! Money well spend for exploring, isn't it?", she smiles.

I love this perspective! I am truly a adventurer who came here to have fun and explore everything that life has to offer. In my survival mode I was not able to understand this, because my inner world was so full of other peoples belief and teatchings on how life should be lived! But I am ready yet another new beginning! This one will be in a life flow. Exploring, experiencing, trusting, not knowing, listening my inner guidance and my intuition, adventuring and thriving! No more surviving mode! No thanks!

To Rogers, these adjustments and these new ways of being, have been taking a little bit time. He hasn't really let go easily on the ways he knows. "I am sorry, again!", he says. "I just want to keep you safe and it terryfies me that I don't know these new ways of being that you are talking about. For me it is not easy, if I don't know. How can I protect you then?"

"But at the end, you always do know", says Victoria. "We are a team and we are in this together. We all learn as we go. And we have to give big thanks to Saija that she has been so patient with us. Our battles are not easy on her or her body, but she has been so brave."

"This is true", says Roger. "She has been very brave and patient too. I just love her so much and I am willing to do what ever it takes to keep her safe. But Victoria, you are right. We are in this together and we will know what to do, when it is time to do it. So I feel more calm and at ease now."

Thank god for me, I laugh! This inner battle between my heart and my ego, is not an easy inner process for sure. And as I say this, Victoria and Roger come to me and we gather for a group hug. Biiiiiig squeeze!

"Welcome our new beginnings, as many as it is meant to be! We will go through anything together and we are stopable! Let the true exploring and thriving begin!"