DOING THINGS ACCORDING TO MY HEART GUIDANCE
It is the holiday season. Christmas is here! Everywhere around me people are preparing gifts, food and timetables for the days to come. I am so out of this vibe! I just don't want to do things the old way anymore. I am done with traditions. So I am sitting in my sofa again with my crew and we end up having a conversation about this.
"Guys, I feel like..... How can I put this..... I feel like "it is too late". It is too late to go back to the old ways. It is too late to connect with the people I have let go long time ago and now the Christmas eve is coming and I don't have no where to go, no one to be with and basically, nothing to do. And if I am totally honest, for me, this is just another day between many other days", I say.
"Love, but this is good", says Victoria (my higher self). "Why should you stress about this? Just see what feels right and do that. It is okey like that. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."
"Yes, I know and honestly, I can't. Your guidance Victoria, is so powerful these days, that Roger (my ego) can not get his voice heard over you", I say. We all end up laughing. This is so true, we all agree.
"It's just that I have been spending so much time alone lately and more and more, I am comfortable with this. It is so clear, that I rather be alone, then with people, who invite me to visit, just because it is an obligation. Or out of bitty. Or because it has always been this way. Christmas eve, well you are "supposed" to spend it with your family and for me, there is no family. I have already let them go long time ago and nothing is left to say. Or to do. I am little bit confused here, if I am totally honest. I am happy by myself, but somehow sad, that I am left so alone", I say.
Cynthia (my god fairy) jumps in: "Love, this is your life. Your creation. You are not the same person that you once were. Now it is time to really and I mean REALLY, let go of the past and also the darkness and the thoughts you were having while the cleansing process was on. Sometimes it is also very easy to get stuck into those feelings you have been feeling for so long. And part of your cleansing was to face all the darkness you had inside of yourself. But love, now it is gone! There is nothing to clear anymore. And now it is time for you to acknowledge this. Even though Roger is trying to keep in this state of mind, it is safe to let go of this and allow this new lightness to come out. This is your fairy tale now. A new one. So jump into it fully! This is so exciting! What would be the first step for you to do in order for you to get to this new, lighter mind set?"
"Victoria, help!" I shout. "What does this mean", I ask her. "Break the old ways of spending Christmas. What would you like to do? After all, the old is now gone. As you said, it is too late for that anymore. So do what brings you joy. Joy is your guide from now on, nothing else. This is a good way to start", Victoria says. And I just love this!
So oh my, here starts my Christmas fairy tale!
Oh yes! I am the only one who can know what is good for me, so let's start from this. And so I talk to my friend and we decide to go to Helsinki where there is this very cool setting. Outside swimming pool and sauna. While you are swimming you can watch the big boats, city lights and the home of the president. I know I will meet new people and get some fresh energy.
And so we do this. I jump into the train and we walk across Helsinki to the Sea Pool. We buy the tickets with a class of sparkling wine and in we go. We put the bikinis on and shower time it is. And after that to Sauna. I have to tell you this. There is something so magical in Sauna. The heat kind of rips of any heaviness that you might have in your body. It is calming, soothing and refreshing. So we sit in Sauna with other ladies from all over the world. Some tourists have come to Helsinki to spend the Christmas here and this, for sure, is a new experience for them. As it is for me. So I am a tourist too and this is so cool, since I am in my own home country!
After the Sauna, we have a small walk outside and we end up to a heated swimming pool. And oh my, the feeling I get from this! It is amazing!!!!!! "Guys, did you see the "blue moment" when the day started to unfold into the evening?!", I ask my crew. "Yes, it was so beautiful!! We are so happy we got to experience this!!", they say. "Me too, I have to say! I could have never ever imagine that I could feel so light and pure after this!"
"So love, you see now? You can create you life just the way you want it", says Victoria. "Oh yes", I replay with a smile on my face. I understand now that I have to let everything and anything - any tradition or restriction - behind me and I need to understand now fully, that I am free. Totally free to create my life just the way I want it. No need to think how "I should" do things or what is the right way by the society. Oh no! All I have to do, is listen to my heart and Victoria.
My Christmas end up being the best one in years! I did what I wanted, I had no stress about buying gifts and instead of eating too much, I actually did exercise every day. I relaxed, watched movies in the candle light and took long walks in the woods. After the holidays, I felt fresh and light and totally relaxed! Wonderful!!!!!
And then came the new years eve. "You have to let the house go". I am quiet for a while. Did I hear this correctly?! And then I hear it again. "It is time to let the house go." I am just getting dressed and just about to go out to see the fireworks to the park. I think I knew somewhere deep inside of me, that this day would come soon, but now? I get the message now?
I hear Victoria's whisper and I let it sink in. And I know she is right. It is time to leave the old and jump into the unknown. Victoria keeps whispering me: "You can give your notice and let the house go. We will guide you forward. Papa is here, I am here, we are all here. Nothing to be afraid of. Things will go very well." And deep inside of me I know this is true, because staying here, is not an option. And if I am totally honest, in this moment, when I hear Victoria's voice, I feel joy! I feel expansion! I feel lightness and happiness! Because now I understand, that I have actually waited for this. I have waited my heart's guidance to get us out of the surroundings that we have outgrown. So if I am totally honest, instead of fear, I feel excitement! I feel relief! And this only tells me how ready I am for the new.
These days, this guidance, my heart and Victoria's, are the only ones I listen. I know that they will always guide me forward and into experiences much more greater than my mind or Roger could ever imagine. So 1.1.2020 at 11.11 a clock, I gave my notice for the house and after 8 weeks, I am leaving. I know that I don't want to push myself too hard, so I allow this 8 weeks time for myself to adjust to this new idea of really "jumping to the flow of life".
Now, all I can do, is trust the process of change. Sell my stuff and that is not much, because I have sold basically all my stuff already during the years. I will pack my suitcase and hit the road where ever it will take me. Roger is trying all that he can to convince me, that this is a bad idea, but now, I kiss him on the cheek and I thank him for trying to keep me safe. But my happiness is more important then any fear I might have. My soul needs so much more space. And so me and Victoria are the only ones who can lead us to our freedom.
This is how I truly start to create my own fairy tale. One step at the time. One moment at the time. No rush, no pushing. Without knowing anything, but just trusting, that my heart and Victoria are now strong enough to lead this team of ours to new adventures. I am amazingly calm and relaxed. No need to control, but just to enjoy. There are no goals anymore, but there is life to be experienced. Destination is not the point, but living every moment is. No need to go to the future or plan too much. All I have to do is to keep my heart fully open to the gifts of the Universe. And enjoy the ride!
"Guys, I feel like..... How can I put this..... I feel like "it is too late". It is too late to go back to the old ways. It is too late to connect with the people I have let go long time ago and now the Christmas eve is coming and I don't have no where to go, no one to be with and basically, nothing to do. And if I am totally honest, for me, this is just another day between many other days", I say.
"Love, but this is good", says Victoria (my higher self). "Why should you stress about this? Just see what feels right and do that. It is okey like that. You don't have to do anything you don't want to."
"Yes, I know and honestly, I can't. Your guidance Victoria, is so powerful these days, that Roger (my ego) can not get his voice heard over you", I say. We all end up laughing. This is so true, we all agree.
"It's just that I have been spending so much time alone lately and more and more, I am comfortable with this. It is so clear, that I rather be alone, then with people, who invite me to visit, just because it is an obligation. Or out of bitty. Or because it has always been this way. Christmas eve, well you are "supposed" to spend it with your family and for me, there is no family. I have already let them go long time ago and nothing is left to say. Or to do. I am little bit confused here, if I am totally honest. I am happy by myself, but somehow sad, that I am left so alone", I say.
Cynthia (my god fairy) jumps in: "Love, this is your life. Your creation. You are not the same person that you once were. Now it is time to really and I mean REALLY, let go of the past and also the darkness and the thoughts you were having while the cleansing process was on. Sometimes it is also very easy to get stuck into those feelings you have been feeling for so long. And part of your cleansing was to face all the darkness you had inside of yourself. But love, now it is gone! There is nothing to clear anymore. And now it is time for you to acknowledge this. Even though Roger is trying to keep in this state of mind, it is safe to let go of this and allow this new lightness to come out. This is your fairy tale now. A new one. So jump into it fully! This is so exciting! What would be the first step for you to do in order for you to get to this new, lighter mind set?"
"Victoria, help!" I shout. "What does this mean", I ask her. "Break the old ways of spending Christmas. What would you like to do? After all, the old is now gone. As you said, it is too late for that anymore. So do what brings you joy. Joy is your guide from now on, nothing else. This is a good way to start", Victoria says. And I just love this!
So oh my, here starts my Christmas fairy tale!
Oh yes! I am the only one who can know what is good for me, so let's start from this. And so I talk to my friend and we decide to go to Helsinki where there is this very cool setting. Outside swimming pool and sauna. While you are swimming you can watch the big boats, city lights and the home of the president. I know I will meet new people and get some fresh energy.
And so we do this. I jump into the train and we walk across Helsinki to the Sea Pool. We buy the tickets with a class of sparkling wine and in we go. We put the bikinis on and shower time it is. And after that to Sauna. I have to tell you this. There is something so magical in Sauna. The heat kind of rips of any heaviness that you might have in your body. It is calming, soothing and refreshing. So we sit in Sauna with other ladies from all over the world. Some tourists have come to Helsinki to spend the Christmas here and this, for sure, is a new experience for them. As it is for me. So I am a tourist too and this is so cool, since I am in my own home country!
After the Sauna, we have a small walk outside and we end up to a heated swimming pool. And oh my, the feeling I get from this! It is amazing!!!!!! "Guys, did you see the "blue moment" when the day started to unfold into the evening?!", I ask my crew. "Yes, it was so beautiful!! We are so happy we got to experience this!!", they say. "Me too, I have to say! I could have never ever imagine that I could feel so light and pure after this!"
"So love, you see now? You can create you life just the way you want it", says Victoria. "Oh yes", I replay with a smile on my face. I understand now that I have to let everything and anything - any tradition or restriction - behind me and I need to understand now fully, that I am free. Totally free to create my life just the way I want it. No need to think how "I should" do things or what is the right way by the society. Oh no! All I have to do, is listen to my heart and Victoria.
My Christmas end up being the best one in years! I did what I wanted, I had no stress about buying gifts and instead of eating too much, I actually did exercise every day. I relaxed, watched movies in the candle light and took long walks in the woods. After the holidays, I felt fresh and light and totally relaxed! Wonderful!!!!!
And then came the new years eve. "You have to let the house go". I am quiet for a while. Did I hear this correctly?! And then I hear it again. "It is time to let the house go." I am just getting dressed and just about to go out to see the fireworks to the park. I think I knew somewhere deep inside of me, that this day would come soon, but now? I get the message now?
I hear Victoria's whisper and I let it sink in. And I know she is right. It is time to leave the old and jump into the unknown. Victoria keeps whispering me: "You can give your notice and let the house go. We will guide you forward. Papa is here, I am here, we are all here. Nothing to be afraid of. Things will go very well." And deep inside of me I know this is true, because staying here, is not an option. And if I am totally honest, in this moment, when I hear Victoria's voice, I feel joy! I feel expansion! I feel lightness and happiness! Because now I understand, that I have actually waited for this. I have waited my heart's guidance to get us out of the surroundings that we have outgrown. So if I am totally honest, instead of fear, I feel excitement! I feel relief! And this only tells me how ready I am for the new.
These days, this guidance, my heart and Victoria's, are the only ones I listen. I know that they will always guide me forward and into experiences much more greater than my mind or Roger could ever imagine. So 1.1.2020 at 11.11 a clock, I gave my notice for the house and after 8 weeks, I am leaving. I know that I don't want to push myself too hard, so I allow this 8 weeks time for myself to adjust to this new idea of really "jumping to the flow of life".
Now, all I can do, is trust the process of change. Sell my stuff and that is not much, because I have sold basically all my stuff already during the years. I will pack my suitcase and hit the road where ever it will take me. Roger is trying all that he can to convince me, that this is a bad idea, but now, I kiss him on the cheek and I thank him for trying to keep me safe. But my happiness is more important then any fear I might have. My soul needs so much more space. And so me and Victoria are the only ones who can lead us to our freedom.
This is how I truly start to create my own fairy tale. One step at the time. One moment at the time. No rush, no pushing. Without knowing anything, but just trusting, that my heart and Victoria are now strong enough to lead this team of ours to new adventures. I am amazingly calm and relaxed. No need to control, but just to enjoy. There are no goals anymore, but there is life to be experienced. Destination is not the point, but living every moment is. No need to go to the future or plan too much. All I have to do is to keep my heart fully open to the gifts of the Universe. And enjoy the ride!
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